Your Questions About If You Choose To Accept This Mission

August 29, 2012

Lizzie asks…

Can you write an entertaining story (for creative fun) and include these zany phrases?

1) I’ll have the fava beans and a glass of chianti.
2) Why that’s the lovliest____I’ve ever seen!!
3) Your mission if you choose to accept it is_______
4) I’m Snow White and this is Rose red………
5) Silence Earthling!!!
6) Oh BROTHER!!!! Not AGAIN!!!

admin answers:

Dodge City,Kansas
Circa 1875

PART ONE WENT LIKE THIS:;_ylt=AqXqyAuCxzJnNCeh9T6TB.Lty6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20090425103234AAmRu0d&show=7#profile-info-AA11728993

And now……..



Sunshine swung around and stared wide-eyed…..”If it wasn’t YOUR hand, then whose WAS it?!”

Matt thought for a moment…..” MAybe…..Maybe……”

“For GAWD’S sake stop stuttering!!” Sunshine yelled.

“I don’t care for the way you speak to me when you are upset,ya know!!”

Sunshine grabbed him by the collar……”FINISH THE SENTENCE!!!”

“Well…..MAybe it was that ghost that Kitty has complained about. You remember….”

Sunshine laughed. ” Have you been into the liquor cabinet,again,baby? Haha.”

“No; But now that you mention it…..How about some dinner?
1) I’ll have the fava beans and a glass of chianti.”

“”Uh huh….And I suppose you want ME to cook?!…..6) Oh BROTHER!!!! Not AGAIN!!! Didn’t I just do that LAST night?!”

Matt glared at her. “3) Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to act like a woman and feed your man!!!”

“Ohhhhhhh…..myyyyyyyy……GAWD!!!! I was up at the crack of dawn, just like you, working my ass off….the only difference is,I wasn’t paid to do it!!!” Matt tried to cuddle her but she pushed him away.

“Baby Cakes…..2) Why that’s the lovliest dress I’ve ever seen!! Is it new?”

“Gawd you are so pathetic .” Sunshine smiled at his feeble attempt to calm the waters.

He tried ,again………….”I know!!! Let’s go to town and eat at DelMonico’s!!”

Sunshine grabbed her shawl and was out the door in a flash!

By the time they reached Dodge, DelMonico’s was in full swing.

The waiter: “I’m sorry,Marshal Dillon…..No room at the inn , as they say.” Kitty motioned to them to join her at her table that she was sharing with Doc and Festus.

She leered when she saw Sunshine, clutched to Matt’s arm.
” ‘Lo, Matt.” She nodded at her adversary ……….”Moron.”

Sunshine,accustomed to Kitty’s sarcasm, smiled and waved hello.

“Matthew? Miss Kitty was jest a’tellin’ us ’bout that incident over at her place, the other night. ‘Lo ,Miss Sunshine.” Festus smiled as he held her chair for her.

A still shaken Kitty …….” The FIRST time I was visited by the ghost, I tried to be friendly, in hopes of dissuading him from haunting me.”

“What did you do? Offer him a snortful of that rotgut that you so dearly love?!” said Doc.

Everyone laughed…..everyone but Kitty. She slowly turned towards Doc…..”NO!
I simply said,’ Hello, good looking.4) I’m Snow White and this is Rose Red Sparkling Wine………Care for a nightcap?”

Doc chuckled…..”To which he replied……?”

Kitty’s face went pale as she remembered …..”He spoke in a voice that sent shivers down my spine. He said…..5) ‘Silence Earthling!!! Speak ONLY when I tell you, to’!!”

Sunshine murmurmed…..”So THAT’S how to shut you up!!!”

Matt rocked back in his chair in fits of laughter.

Just then the door blew open……There was NO wind.

Everyone in the restaurant stopped talking and watched as a shadowy figure approached Kitty’s table.

“HellOOOOOOOOOOOO, Miss Russell !!!!”

Sunshine…… Screamed and spit out her bite of buttered bread………..and her hair stood straight up!!

Matt ……. Went for his gun and started shooting.

Doc ……. Stared in disbelief.

Festus soiled his pants.

Kitty ……… Wiped a chunk of buttered bread from her face and grabbed her emergency bottle of Randy Scouse Git Rotgut that she kept in her purse.


CAst of Characters:

Miss Kitty …….. Http://
Festus ……. Http://
Doc ……. Http://
Sunshine …… Http://
Matt ….. Http://

Charles asks…

Can you write an entertaining story that includes these lines for wordplay fun?

1) Your mission if you should choose to accept it is_____________
2) I’m inviting Donald Trump, Simon Cowell, and_________
3) He does look rather pale doesn’t he?
4) That is SO not true about vampires…they don’t_______
5) Merlot, pomegranite juice or _________?
6) What is eye of newt anyway……?
7) They have their own version of_______

admin answers:

Dodge City, Kansas
Circa 1875

“Eye of Newt,Toe of Frog and Brain of Festus”

Festus:”Doc? 6) What is eye of newt anyway……?
What in tarnation are you talking about?!”

Doc winked at Kitty.

Doc:” Festus…..I will try to speak slooooooowly….”

Festus:”Shoot! Jest git on with it, would ya?”

Doc:” 1) Your mission if you should choose to accept it is to shut up and pay attention.”

Festus:”That’s it !! I don’t give a good ding dong iffn’ you DID go to some fancy school. I’m not gonna sit here and let you consendend to me.”


Festus squinted his left eye:” That’s what I said.”

Doc:”Kitty. One must forgive Festus for his ….ummmm…..lack of traditional schooling.”

Festus:”I done went to school, you old scutter!! Whyyyyyy ,I’ve a good mind…..”2) I’m inviting Donald Trump, Simon Cowell, and Madame Dubarry to come to Dodge and testify to the fact that I’ve been learned.

Doc: ” Taught.”

Festus emitted a low growl. 7) “They have their own version of my book larnin.”

Doc:” Learing.” Doc rubbed his face, as is his wont, and tried little to suppress a smile. “Festus…… Trump is doing time in Leavenworth for embezzlement. Cowell was shipped back to England for failure to file income taxes and for Madame DuBARRY!!!! She runs a brothel in Tucson.”

Before Festus had a chance to reply Kitty stood up:” 5) Merlot, pomegranite juice or beer? ”

Festus was so upset that he grabbed the beer and downed a mug in one long sip. Unfortunately the majority of it went down his windpipe. He grabbed his throat.

Kitty:” DOC!!! What’s wrong with Festus?!!”

Doc turned his head :”Hmmmm…..3) He does look rather pale .Kinda looks like a vampire, doesn’t he?” He started to put on some latex gloves.

Sunshine overheard the conversation as she and her boyfriend, U.S. Marshal Matt Dillon, ambled into the Longbranch. “4) That is SO not true about vampires…they don’t turn pale because of CHOKING!!!” She immediately adopted her “Cowgirl On A Mission “persona and administered CPR to her friend. Kitty watched in amazement as Festus started breathing normally and color was restored to his face. Due to Sunshine’s rather bold maneuvers( she did, after all, learn her techinque from Matt), Festus’ dentures landed on Kitty’s lap.

Matt beamed with pride and broke into song:

♫ ” That’s why I call her my Annie Oakley. Okie Dokie.
Cowgirl with unlimited charm.
She can take your breath away. She can get you breathing.
I’m so proud to have her on my arm…….”♫

Kitty flicked the dentures off her lap, put her hands over her eyes and finished off everyone’s beer as she watched Matt grab Sunshine and kiss her passionately.


Festus…… Http://
Matt and his Sunshine……

Steven asks…

“The Night The Lights Went Out In Georgia”?

This was actually a hit song from Vicky Lawrence (Carol Burnette Show and Momma’s Family). You mission, if you choose to accept it is this….

1.Name a hit song from a TV Star
2.Name a hit song from a Movie Star
3.Name a movie that was based on a song (and shares the same title as that song)

admin answers:

In keeping with your 70s theme…

1.Don’t Give Up On Us- David Soul
2.The Rose-Bette Midler
3.You Light Up My Life

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